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Ten Ways to spot Low Self- Esteem

Ten Ways Low Self- Esteem creates a permanently ‘Stressed’ state

1. Low self esteem impairs our ability to function well in life. Self- esteem is necessary for survival.

2. Low self-esteem can manifest in a lack of self-responsibility: so I see others as sources of approval or disapproval and I see others in terms of what they can or cannot do for me.

3. A person with low self esteem can project an illusion of self confidence – however when they are challenged, this illusion easily crumbles.

4. Poor self esteem drives self- destructive behaviour: it places people in an adversarial relationship to their own wellbeing.

”High self esteem people can surely be knocked down by an excess of troubles but they are quicker to pick themselves up again”

5. Someone with low self esteem can find the amount of choice available to them today – disconcerting… and can thus find solace in groups and organisations which (*restrict choice and thinking and) have rigid rules and regulations. Or even substances that do the same *.

6. People with low self esteem can be found to obediently follow rules without reflecting on the application of the said rules in context.

7. Someone with low self esteem can find it humiliating to admit an error.

8. A person with low self esteem may achieve a lot of intellectual knowledge but remain lacking in self understanding ( so essentially they remain a stranger unto themselves).

9. A person with low self esteem operates their life by seeking out relationships where they will be rejected; for if you love me you cannot possibly be good enough for me’.
A person with low self esteem sees rejection where rejection does not exist.

10. A person with low self esteem is less connected with themselves; they do not notice what is going on within; feelings, behaviour, thoughts. They do not value knowing themselves better.

(ref. ‘The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem’ by Nathaniel Branden)

What now?

So what can we do about it? Read this blog about Self-Leadership. If you would like to learn new ways to build your self esteem, click here for dates for the next self-leadership training.

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